So, here's the thing, I'm just going to say it and accept the backlash that this controversial statement will likely create. I just didn't like Oahu. I could write paragraph after paragraph listing all of my reasons, but really they can all be summed up thusly:
1) Tiny island, LOTS of people.
2) Big city conventionality.
If you want to get a parking spot at the beach, you have to be there by 8 am, or walk miles from the closest available spot. It may look like it will only take 10 or 15 minutes to get to Waikiki from the airport, but it will, in fact, take an hour. And all of this in a place that has become nothing but a bite-sized, beach-side version of Times Square. Were we miserable while we were there? Well, sometimes we were, but overall, no. Were we ready to go home when the seventeenth rolled around? Yes.
But our hotel room was nice.
And our view was TOO DIE FOR.
But first! We had to finish our Kauai "to do list". No, I didn't make an itinerary, but come on, you didn't think I would go on vacation with at least SOME sort of goals in mind! The morning before we caught our flight we woke up to the torrential downpour of Tropical Depression Felicia. Lucky for us, she apparently had gotten wind of our schedule and was kind enough to clear up for our visit to the Kauai Coffee Company (tried the coffee--still hate it) and the Hyatt at Poipu for lunch (new goal--STAY THERE SOMEDAY). The waves were still enormous, but the sun was shining, and we were crying on the inside as we headed off to the airport to do battle with the car rental agency. It was, however, with a joyful heart that we waved goodbye to our crappy PT Cruiser, and soon we were back in the air, on the way to our next island.
We were greeted by a lovely rainbow over the mountains as we drove to Waikiki, but opted to stay in for the night as Felicia's rain had followed us. We dined on delicious Wolfgang Puck Express Pizzas as we watched the mysteries of magic revealed on tv. The next morning we dragged ourselves out of bed and headed to Pearl Harbor to visit the Arizona Memorial. It was an intensely powerful experience, and I found myself not in the minority as a few tears made an appearance as I looked down into the oil-slicked water. It wasn't the most uplifting moment of our trip, but I think a reminder about the true cost of freedom is important every now and then.
For lunch, we decided to check out Hickham AFB, where a few of our friends will be moving in the next few months, and then went back to the hotel to get ready for the Hale Koa luau that evening. Now, I can't speak for other luaus, but I can tell you this, if you're looking for good food, hot men climbing coconut trees, women shaking what the good Lord gave them, and a delicious pina colada, then the Hale Koa luau is the place for you. We were even treated to an adult contemporary hit of the late 80s as the MC sang his world famous chart topper, Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You. (You have to watch that video--horses, beaches, sunsets, pink sundresses--you will NOT regret it.) (I may or may not have downloaded that the minute I got back home.) (I did.) He's a high school teacher now.
The next morning we totally rejected the schedule we'd decided on the night before and slept until after ten. Which meant that we began hiking Diamond Head around noon. Bad Idea Pants. Which leads me to a recurring observation we had about Hawaiian hiking levels--they say "easy", I say "It's not easy if you can't hike it with a pina colada in hand and not break a sweat." They say "potato", I say "bullshit". Fortunately, it was a fairly impressive sight once we heaved our broken bodies up the final step, and even more fortunately there was a moderately shady spot for me to sit. Triple fortunate, and a damn good marketing strategy, there was a shave ice stand at the bottom of the crater.
We rewarded ourselves with a long afternoon at the beach across the street from our hotel, and that night had the great fortune of meeting up with a longtime "internet friend", Mandy, and her husband. We met at the Outrigger Waikiki for dinner at the Hula Grill, then wedged ourselves into Duke's for an after-dinner drink. It was so much fun to meet someone that I've felt so close to over the years without ever having actually met and have her turn out to be just as awesome in person as she is online. I could have happily sucked down another couple of daiquiris, but we were all clearly wiped out by 9:30 and my stomach was already tying itself up in knots at the thought of our next morning's adventure...
